


Nice Try

by moonjump05



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Awkward Connor, Gen, Wingman Hank, chicks dig dogs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-20
Updated: 2018-07-02
Packaged: 2019-05-25 22:10:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14986649
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moonjump05/pseuds/moonjump05
Summary: Hank is a great wingman.  Chicks dig Sumo.





	1. Wingman Hank

**Author's Note:**

> Sometime after a peaceful ending.

“You should ask her out.”

Blinking, Connor looked up from his tablet. The article ‘White is the New Blue: Advancements in Android Biocomponents’ completely forgotten, “Hank?”

Across the rather dingy diner table a seemingly nonchalant shrug, “You should ask her out,” he repeated before grabbing the other half of his philly melt. A cup of soup- loaded baked potato- was empty and pushed to the side and the side of waffle fries diminished to just a pile instead of overflowing from the oval plate, “She’s making goo goo eyes at you.”

Connor frowned, “’Goo goo eyes’?”

“Yeah,” Hank spoke around his sandwich, “Like this,” he proceeded to flutter his eyes excessively.

“No one has made those gestures, Hank. And if someone had I would have recommended emergency medical intervention.”

A groan, “Well, she doesn’t do it when you can see it. Obviously.”

“Then how-?”

“Here,” he interrupted, holding up his half filled glass for a refill, “I’ll help you out.”

Catching the eye of their usual waitress, she came over quickly from behind the counter weaving between the empty tables. “Another?” she smiled pleasantly between the two of them but didn’t quite meet his gaze.

Connor scanned her: Ward, Alicia. DOB 2/27/2009 Prior Convictions: None

“Yeah, thanks Alicia,” Hank handed her the glass, “Slow night, huh?”

She nodded clearly willing to chat, “Glacial. You two usually aren’t here this late.”

“Duty calls, you know.” a self satisfied sigh, “Just doing our job- taking a bite out of crime.”

Her eyes widened, “Must have been an important case.”

“We were participating in the quarterly continuing education module,” Connor explained helpfully, “”Safety in the Workplace’ which covers fire hazards, ergonomics-”

Hank kicked him under the table, “- right before we were called in. Big case- kinda secret so you won’t hear about it- but Connor here caught the perp singlehandedly.”

“Wow!” she gushed, eyeing the android admiringly, “That must be _quite_ the story.”

“Impressive, huh?”

They were both looking at him rather expectantly, he attempted to smile. It was rather awkward.

A long moment passed.

Alicia’s smile dropped down a few notches, but was still smoothly cheery “I’ll go get your drink,” she walked away.

Hank groaned, “Goddammit, Connor.”

 

 

 

 

 


	2. Chicks Dig Dogs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chicks dig dogs.

Riiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnggggggg.

No answer.

RRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGG.

“Wha’ da fuck-” barking started and the door swung open to a sniffling Hank still in his bathrobe, “Jesus Christ, Connor. Whatta you doing here?”

He held up a take out bag, “Chicken soup is the traditional remedy for upper respiratory infections. Since you called in to work sick I thought it appropriate.”

“I’m not sick, it’s allergies,” he grumbled but took the bag and peered inside a bit warily, “You didn’t make this, did you?”

“No, I ordered it from the diner,” he didn’t own the appliances necessary for cooking soup, “Alicia suggested a piece of pie as well, for her favorite customers she said.”

Hank nodded appreciatively, “And here I thought you were a lost cause. Well, come on in.”

Blankets were piled up on the sofa, wrestling on the TV. Sumo padded over for a scratch and even more likely to beg for food as Hank set out the containers on his table. The dog sat down by his owner, big ropes of drool hanging from his jowls.

“Ugh, now we’re both leaking like faucets,” he took a drink of something hot.

A quick scan: 82.86% water, 17.14% ethanol Variant on cocktail Hot Toddy

Connor motioned to the mug, “Alcohol consumption increases the likelihood of dehydration and has adverse effects with most common sinus symptom medications-”

“-it’s for my sore throat. Kills the germs.”

He crossed his arms and raised a brow, “I thought you had allergies.”

“Look,” he pointed a finger, “I don’t need no sass. Do me a favor and take Sumo out,” his tail started to wag hearing his name, “There’s a dog park a few blocks away. Let him run around.”

Connor considered for a moment, unconsciously tilting his head as he looked at Sumo. Sumo tilted his head in response, “Alright, Hank,” a shooing gesture and a grunt was the only indication Hank was listening, “C’mon Sumo,” a moment to attach to leash and they were both walking down the residential sidewalk.

The Labor Day weekend heat had subsided by midweek, this afternoon cooling rapidly. Connor couldn’t really appreciate it, but was glad for Sumo’s sake. All that fur.

Padding along, sniffing various bushes, watching the cars roll by. A matching gait, background scans vigilant, internal GPS directions to the target.

Todd Tyrell Dog Park  
Hours: Sunrise to Sunset  
Follow the Rules of the Park!

There was a 2D barcode. Connor scanned it and downloaded the rules of the park, helpful tips and even video files that showed proper etiquette and behavior. There were only a few other people with their dogs, a woman and a couple in the small dog run area ( a terrier and a mixed breed playing) and a woman in the large dog area with, a scan of the brown fleece coated dog, a labradoodle.

Connor stepped into the holding pen, Sumo’s implant unlocking the gate. He unhooked the leash and Sumo trotted out to sniff at the other dog, tail wagging lazily.

A few moments to ensure that nothing was amiss, Connor went to sit on the metal benches lining the enclosure. Watching the dogs play was relaxing, contentment on a basic level. Better than considering the message Markus had sent him-

“Wow! What a beautiful dog!” a voice cut through his thoughts, “What’s his name?”

Connor turned, it was the woman from the small dog enclosure, standing over him with a hand on her hip, smiling down widely.

Gibson, Teagan. DOB: 11/10/2014 Prior Convictions: None

“Sumo, his name is Sumo.”

An eyebrow tweaked up, “Interesting name, his owner must have an interesting one too.”

“Hank Anderson.”

“Well, Hank, I’m Teagan,” she held out a hand.

Standing up and shaking the hand politely, “My name is Connor,” something pinged on his audio scanner behind him, he frowned concerned.

The smile faltered for a fraction of a second before she caught herself and met his eyes, “So Hank is your brother? A neighbor?” her tone hopeful.

“My partner,” he said as he swung around, missing Teagan’s jaw drop, “Excuse me.”

Connor walked over to the other bench to the other lone woman. His audio input had detected her distressed muttering. Byron, Julia. DOB:7/3/1962 Prior Convictions: Expunged

He knelt down, “Is something wrong?”

Julia looked up from her purse, watery eyes behind thick glasses, “Oh, young man. I seem to have lost my phone. Would you mind calling it?”

“Of course,” she was reciting her number, or what she thought was her number, but Connor just accessed the public database himself, his LED yellow as he called. It was ringing, but not here, “I don’t think your phone is here.”

Her wrinkled face fell, “I must have lost it on the way here. I know I had it before I left- I was talking to my daughter Veronica you see. She’s on vacation, going to another concert-”

“-Perhaps if we retraced your steps?” he didn’t mean to interrupt, but the more time passed the lower the likelihood of finding the missing possession, “I will continue calling.”

“Oh, thank you!” she gripped his arm as he helped her up with one hand, the other going to her mouth with a shrill whistle, “Ash!”

The labradoodle’s fuzzy ears perked up and he padded over obediently. Sumo followed his friend allowing for an easy leash up and exit.

***

Sumo whined and scratched at the door while Connor shifted the pan under one arm to turn the knob. Nearly knocking him off balance, the big dog hurried in and went straight to Hank laying on the couch, licking his face.

“…yeah, just like that…”

Connor cleared his throat. Loudly.

Hank jerked awake, blinking for a moment and then pushing his affectionate dog away, “Alright, alright that’s enough,” he sat up and eyed Connor, “You get pulled into another rebellion or something? What took ya?”

“Sorry, Hank,” he put the pan down on the coffee table and seated himself in a chair, “I was assisting a woman at the dog park.”

That got his attention, “A woman, huh?”

“She lost her phone.”

Hank leaned in, “Did she lose her number and ask for yours?”

“No, she remembered her number,” she did, eventually, “But we had to retrace her steps.”

“Bringing you home already?” he almost looked impressed.

“Yes, we found the phone near her porch. It must have fallen as she left.”

Hank whistled, “She must have been grateful.”

Connor nodded, pleased that his modest mission was successful, “She invited me in for a reward.”

“So that’s what took you so long!” he beamed. Connor had the feeling that if he was closer Hank would have clapped him on the back, “You sly dog!”

It did take a while to bake the brownies, but Julia was insistent that he not leave empty handed. He did try and tell her that the baked edibles would be rather wasted on him, but she seemed so delighted to reward him he just couldn’t correct her. Whether he was sly about it was up for debate, “I couldn’t say no,” he shrugged a bit helplessly before peeling back the plastic wrap.

Hank seemed to notice the pan of brownies for the first time and shifted his focus accordingly, “Those look good.”

Connor ran a quick search of high rated posted images, compared them and concluded that yes they were certainly aesthetically pleasing, “Help yourself.”

Very willing to do just that, Hank reached out and then paused. Frowned. But then got an ‘ah ha!’ look, “Hey, Connor.”

“Yes, Hank?”

“Run an analysis on these, would ya?”

Connor paused, “Last time I ran analysis you said, and I quote,” he actually switched to the audio recording, “’Goddamnit Connor, stop licking every fucking thing in sight’” Hank’s voice said out of Connor’s mouth.

Hank grimaced, “Christ, that’s weird.”

Connor just had an ‘I told you so’ look.

“This is different. It’s a fucking brownie, not a chewed up pen-”

“-Technician Bateman was very impressed-”

“-Bateman is a fucking weirdo-”

“-The pen showed traces of the poison used in the murder-”

Something horrible dawned on Hank’s face, “Shit, Connor- do you have some disinfecting cycle or something?”

Connor frowned, unsure of the human’s reasoning, “I self purify regularly. Contamination from previous samples could affect current analysis.”

“Okay,” relief flooded Hank, “Just…just don’t forget.”

“Of course.”

“I still want you to lick the brownie.”

An android sigh.

Connor reached over and took a brownie from the pan and took a bite.

Chocolate Brownie  
Calories: 380 Total Fat: 16g Sodium: 250 mg  
Tetrahydrocannabinol (C21H30O2)

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been having fun adding fictional android references.

**Author's Note:**

> Damn I need more Hank and Connor.


End file.
